By T. Trolley

You may think that everyday language -- from the
playground to the TV sitcom -- has fallen into the
gutter and you'd probably be right.

But you haven't heard anything! The foul language and
public name-calling hurled around on the streets of
Elizabethan England from 1500 to 1700 was far worse
than anything we hear today.

According to new research from an historian, the language used then was
brimming with offensive sexual insults that were considerably more
lewd than anything heard on today's broadcast media.
In fact, the exchanges were so entertaining and bawdy,
they were dubbed "street theater." And surprisingly
enough, women were the worst offenders! Why? It gave
them power.

And it was especially entertaining when the exchange
degenerated into physical confrontations between the
ladies involved -- allowing them to display their
physical strength against their adversary!

Gossipmongering and heated public exchanges were
weapons used by women to wield power and influence.
Public name-calling by women was used to
demoralize an adversary, trigger damaging gossip
throughout the neighborhood, and turn public opinion
against the alleged offender.

Women always hurled their insults in public. The No. 1
insult: Calling a woman a whore. Such a charge of
prostitution undermined a woman's social and moral
standing.

Perhaps that explains somewhat what happened between
Teresa and Shawn. Both of these two women had loud
mouthes on them and, with huge egos and pride behind
them as well, the two continued to raise the ante when
they directed their insults at each other in public.

Pretty soon, the accusations and insults exchanged
between the two women reached a crescendo and both hit
their boiling points!

Teresa had spread around a rumor that Shawn was
afflicted with a venereal disease, syphilis to be
exact. Shawn confronted Teresa about this rumor and
told her told her neighbour to "pull up your bra
higher and hide your piggy face and go home and scrape
your mangy behind!"

Out of nowhere, a furious Teresa connected with an
effective punch to the left breast of Shawn! Shawn was
hurt by the blow and attempted a kick to Teresa's left
leg in response! Teresa successfully blocked the
assault, and landed an effective punch to the left
breast of her equally conditioned opponent -- hurting
Shawn once again!

A crowd gathered to watch as the 5-3, 162 lbs. of
Shawn tried to kick Teresa in the left leg again! But
the 5-2, 145 lb. Teresa thwarted the offensive and
attempted a punch to Shawn's left breast again! Shawn,
however, successfully blocked the assault and
attempted another kick to Teresa's left leg! Teresa
frustrateed her rival's attempt and tried another
punch to Shawn's left breast.

Shawn evaded the blow and attempted another kick to
Teresa's left leg. Teresa Bennett thwarted the
offensive, and successfully put Shawn in a headlock!

With the crowd cheering Teresa on, Shawn struggled,
trying to free herself from the short, slightly pudgy
arms of Teresa that are crushing her head. She punches
at Teresa, connecting with a blow to the stomach, and
the force of the clamping arms is weakened enough for
her to escape! The flabby Shawn grabs onto Teresa's
dark shoulder length hair with both hands, pulling her
head forward and down, then violently back!

This move shocked Teresa as it showed pure savagery
and ferocity from Shawn! Fortunately for Teresa, she
was able to quickly escape, avoiding any further
damage.

Teresa then hit Shawn in the left breast of her less
skilled opponent, hurting Shawn again! Shawn, hurt
and worried, tries a kick to Teresa's left leg, but
Teresa evades the blow, and proficiently delivers an
effective punch to the left breast of her same aged
opponent! The blow met its target and Shawn once again
winces in pain!

A desperate Shawn grabs onto Teresa's dark shoulder
length hair with one hand, and lands two successive
slaps to her face with the other!

Fortunately for Teresa, she is able to quickly escape,
avoiding any further damage. Just when everyone
thought Shawn was too hurt to continue, the angry
woman came back and embarrassed Teresa by
womanhandling her!

The flaccid Teresa moves behind her opponent and puts
her in a half nelson, forcing her arm back, while
pushing her head forward! A surprisingly good,
effective and somewhat skillful move by Teresa -- a
move she learned while being a cheerleader for her
high school boy's wrestling team!

The equally conditioned Shawn twists and pulls
violently, but is unable to get free! A frightened
look appears on her face! But she lands a reverse kick
to her opponent's shin and manages to break free from
the hold.

A red-faced Shawn reaches out and tries to grab her
same aged opponent by her dark shoulder length hair,
but Teresa manages to block the attempt and tries to
take Shawn to the floor in an attempt to apply a choke
hold with her arms, but the heavier Shawn saw the move
coming and stayed clear of the attack. Shawn then
angrily delivers an effective kick to the left leg of
her same aged opponent! Teresa squeals in pain! Shawn
hurt her! An angry Teresa then delivers another
effective punch to the left breast of her less skilled
opponent and hurts her once again as Shawn groans in
pain and staggers slightly from the punch!

Shawn, after hurting Teresa with her last kick, tried
to sink another kick into Teresa's left shin but
Teresa was watching out for the kick and thwarted the
offensive. She then hurt Shawn again with a right hand
to Shawn's left breast! Teresa was really making
headway with that punch of hers to Shawn's left
breast!

Shawn reaches out desperately and tries to grab her
more skilled opponent by her dark shoulder length
hair, but Teresa Bennett quickly moves beyond her
reach. Teresa attempts a punch to Shawn's left breast
once again, working on that weak area, but Shawn
frustrates her rival's attempt and attempts another
kick to Teresa's soft left leg. Teresa thwarts that
move and unleashes an effective punch to the left
breast of her same aged opponent. Shawn is hurt again!

Shawn, almost in tears, grabs Teresa by her dark
shoulder length hair with one hand, and manages to
land three successive slaps to her face with the
other! Wow! How embarrassing for Teresa to be slapped
like that! For a moment, it looked like Shawn came out
of nowhere to womanhandle Teresa and slap her around
like a stepchild!

Teresa is forced to swing her arm over and across
Shawn Johnson's, and pulls back with an elbow to the
face, enabling her to escape. The embittered Teresa
then grabbed Shawn in a headlock!

Shawn punches at her antagonist in an attempt to break
away from the crushing hold around her head. She tries
to push her attacker's arms apart, but Teresa just
keeps up the pressure in hopes of forcing Shawn to
either quit or pass out!

Shawn then manages to wrap one leg behind her
attacker's. With Teresa caught off balance, she is
able to extricate herself! Shawn, trying to capitalize
on her slapping success, reaches out and tries to grab
her more skilled opponent by her dark shoulder length
hair, but Teresa anticipates the move and, not wanting
to be slapped around again, stays out of reach!

But Teresa is angry now and wants to hurt Shawn as she
wraps her short, creamy white arms around Shawn
Johnson's neck, applying a choke hold!

Shawn again punches at her antagonist in an attempt to
break away from the crushing hold, but Teresa holds
on! She then tries to push her attacker's arms apart
as she falls to the ground and to her back, but Teresa
grabs her wrists to restrain her arms above her head
with her right hand and grinds her right forearm into
Shawn's throat!

The trapped woman scrambles to move her body into a
more favorable position. Somehow, she is able to free
one arm, then the other. Luckily, one of Shawn
Johnson's punches makes contact, smacking into
Teresa's chin, and she is able to force a release from
the hold!

As the two women get to their feet, Shawn reaches out
and tries to grab her lighter opponent by her dark
shoulder length hair, but Teresa quickly moves beyond
her reach. She then reaches around Shawn, trying to
put her in a headlock, but Shawn blocks the move with
a retaliatory, almost instinctive, punch to the jaw
with her left hand! Shawn reaches out and tries to
grab her same aged opponent by her dark shoulder
length hair, but Teresa eludes her rival's grasping
hand!

Teresa delivers an effective punch to the left breast
of Shawn, causing Shawn to double over and grab her
breast as the weakened woman lets out a loud groan!
Shawn is weakened, but delivers a surprising kick out
of nowhere to the same aged Teresa's left leg! The
hurt Teresa shrieks in pain!

Teresa again gets Shawn in a headlock. The taller
Shawn is unable to loosen her opponent's hold and
escape! Teresa Bennett shouts at her restrained
opponent, "Are you ready to give?"

Shawn shrieks in pain, "No!" as the dominating woman
only tightens the vice.

"Give it up!" scolds Teresa Bennett.

The flexing muscles of Teresa Bennett's arms continue
their crushing force on her victim's head, causing
Shawn to wince and grimace in pain and agony! Shawn
gathers all the strength she has left, and makes one
last desperate attempt to free herself.

The bent-over Shawn struggles to get her right arm
forward of her opponent's body, then pull back sharply
with an elbow strike to Teresa thigh! Teresa squeals
in pain! As the clasp weakens, Shawn reaches under her
attacker's legs, lifting her into the air, then flips
her to the floor!

Wow, what a turn of events and what a display of
strength by Shawn! Teresa lay on her back with a
worried look on her face as she looks at the kneeling
Shawn!

Although Shawn has escaped and is on her kness while
Teresa is on her back, Teresa takes advantage of her
rival's weakened state by getting to her knees,
quickly getting behind Shawn and followed up with a
half nelson attempt, but the taller Shawn managed to
block it!

From her knees, Shawn reached out with both hands and
tried to grab her shorter opponent by her dark
shoulder length hair, but Teresa Bennett eludes her
rival's grasping hands and, from her knees, attempts a
punch to Shawn's left breast. Shawn thwarts the
offensive, and now from her back lashes out with her
right foot and a kick to Teresa Bennett 's left leg as
she clenches her teeth and her eyes fill with anger!
But an equally angry Teresa frustrates her rival's
attempt by rolling away, then rolls to her knees and
attempts a punch to Shawn's left breast again! Shawn
evades the blow and reaches out and tries to grab her
same aged opponent by her dark shoulder length hair,
but Teresa Bennett eludes her rival's grasping hand!

Teresa uses her catlike quickness to move behind Shawn
and puts her in a half nelson, forcing her arm back,
while pushing her head forward!

The heavier Shawn is unable to extricate herself as
her eyes squint shut and her face reddens! Shawn is
obviously in pain! Teresa shouts at her kneeling,
restrained opponent, "Are you ready to give?"

Shawn shrieks in pain, "No!" as the dominating woman
only squeezes tighter.

"Give it up!" scolds Teresa Bennett.

Now holding her in a full nelson, Teresa only
continues to maintain the restrictive hold.

Shawn gathers all the strength she has left, and makes
one last desperate attempt to free herself.

After several attempts to free herself, a frustrated
and worn out Shawn is forced to drop to the ground
face first, as Teresa Bennett's now seemingly majestic
strength proves too great.

The subdued woman whines, "Let go!"

Shawn starts to cry from the pain as Teresa really
bares down and uses all her arm strength to work over
the helpless Shawn's neck! Shawn keeps pleading and
crying, but Teresa maintains the lock on her rival
with full intensity and suddenly Shawn begins to
tremble in the hold -- as though Teresa was about to
snap her thick neck!

Shawn slowly bends her right leg, then her left as she
continues to tremble and, realizing there is no
escape, finally whimpers, "I give, I give."

The beaten woman's tear-soaked face now bears no
resemblance to that of the prideful woman who first
walked into the room.

The victorious Teresa looks over at me and smiles, as
she slowly releases the hold as the crowd loudly
cheers. What an impressive victory for Teresa!

A tired and sore Shawn tries to crawl to her knees,
but with her upper body strength zapped, she just
slouches back to the ground on every attempt as men in
the audience jeer and berate her!