Celebrity Wrestling

Night 4, Match 2

As Jessica Biel storms back to her dressing room, her tag-team partner (Jessica Alba) races out to meet her. She had been in Biel's dressing room watching the match.

“You ok? She kind of went after your ribs and arm,” Alba says to her partner as they meet up.

“She's a lot stronger than I thought she was. And quick, too. Most of the match, I was just hoping she'd finish me off. I still have a lot of tingling in my arm. I couldn't believe all the whining she did, though. She must think she plays for the San Antonio Spurs, or something. That just pissed me off.”

“Is that why you took the pin instead of working the points out of her?”

“Damn, Jessica, I didn't want her to get a second wind or anything. If she went back after my ribs…I don't think I could have taken that.”

As they reach the dressing room, Brittney Spears steps out of the room next door to Biel's. The Jessicas look into the room to see Josie Maran sifting through her wrestling bag, looking almost disinterested in what Spears was saying.

“That's the plan,” Spears says as she bumps into Jessica Alba accidentally. “Is that ok with you?”

Maran affirms as Alba takes offense to Brittney's carelessness. “An ‘excuse me' would be appropriate,” she says as Spears turns to leave.

“You don't have to get snooty. I'm in hurry. I have a match later. Anyway, you're not my mommy. It's not your responsibility to teach me manners. Try it again and I'll give you something to be upset about.”

With that, Spears heads off to her own dressing room. Alba and Biel head into their room and Alba is still a little fired up about Spears' behavior.

“It seems there's a total lack of respect for people around here. It's like we all have to hate each other all the time. What's with these people?” Alba asks her friend. Before Biel can reply, though, a knock at the door interrupts them. Biel flops into a recliner as Alba answers the door.

“Sorry,” Jennifer Garner says as she sees Alba open the door. “I thought this was Jessica Biel's dressing room.”

“It is. I'm just hanging out. Is there a problem?” Alba responds.

“No. Just wanted to talk to her a second,” Jennifer responds as she steps into the room. “Hey, I wanted to congratulate you. That was a tough match. Sorry about getting on you about the knee. I know you were just doing what you had to do. It's just that Kristanna actually hurt it really bad and it's just starting to feel a little better. I was scared you might permanently injure it. Anyway, it was my fear that got me heated, not anything you did. Good win for you.”

“No problem, Jen. It actually worked against you. It was my anger that pushed me to do something to get into the match. You were tearing me up. Up until that little deal, I just wanted the match to end. I'm going to have to have a talk with the schedule-maker. Getting you and Dushku the first week really sucked.”

“I know what you mean. I had Kristanna, you and I still wrestle tomorrow, too. I think I have to fight you, Jessica,” she says, pointing at Alba.

“Not me. I have Rachel Bilson in the first match.”

“Oh, I must have Simpson, then. I knew it was two Jessicas this week for me. Not exactly an easy ride either way, though.”

“Ooh. I fought her last night. Let me just tell you, she's dirty. Mean, too. It was like she was following me around all night looking for excuses to jump me. I hope you mess her up. She deserves it.”

“Well, I'll see what I can do. Jessica didn't hurt my knee any more, so I'm guessing it'll be better tomorrow. Speaking of which, are the trainers any good? Maybe I could get one to work on it a little.”

Alba replies, “They're awesome. I recommend letting them work it for you. You'll feel much better.”

“Cool. I'll call them. Hey, good luck you two. Take it easy”

With that, Jennifer Garner slips out of the room and heads to her own dressing room. Alba, having the trainers on her mind now, calls one for her partner.

Back in the ring, now, and we're ready for our second match of the evening. Kristanna Loken is hovering in her corner, ready to go. Her 5'11 frame looks particularly intimidating in her leopard spotted bikini shorts and bikini top. Black wrestling boots complete the outfit and she looks dressed to kill. She wears her long blonde hair in a pony tail which bounces as she starts to jog in place. Elisha Cuthbert has to be cussing the scheduling gods as she awaits the start of the match in her corner. The 5'4 blonde beauty started the tournament against 5'11 Victoria Silvestedt in a match that the ref had to stop on her behalf. Victoria pounded her from pillar to post and Cuthbert's back is still aching from the punishment. As she looks across the ring at Loken, she has to be having flashbacks as her new opponent doesn't look different enough from her first one. She's wearing a white string bikini that highlights her curves very nicely. Her hair is loose and cascades down just passed her shoulders. White boots complete her attire. Once again, you have to wonder what might be going on in her mind as she awaits the match's start. Whatever it is, it's time to forget it as the ref signals the start.

Quickly, Kristanna closes the space between her and Cuthbert. As she nears, though, Elisha leaps, landing a flying drop-kick into her chest, driving her backwards. Elisha is quickly back to her feet, a little surprised that Loken didn't go down. She is able, though, to take advantage of her towering opponent's stunned amazement by sliding into a leg-tackle and tripping her to the ground. Loken lands on her stomach and Cuthbert climbs on to her back, grabbing her right arm and putting on a hammer lock. Kristanna slams her fist to the mat, clearly upset at being attacked so efficiently by her spry foe. Cuthbert leaps into the air again, maintaining her hold on the hammer lock and comes down driving her knee into Loken's elbow, further increasing the pain in her arm. Kristanna, though, starts to try and get up. Cuthbert stays with her, straddling her back and continuing to work the arm. Loken gets a leg under herself, trying to get to her feet and free her arm, but as she does, Cuthbert locks her legs in a scissors hold around the waist.

Loken lets out a pined grunt as her ribs are being squeezed and her arm is starting to go numb from the pain. She continues to attempt to get to her feet, though, fighting through the pain. As she gets to her feet, Cuthbert reaches around her neck, trying to maintain both holds and stay mounted on her struggling adversary. Loken stumbles a little, but gets balanced on her feet with her face starting turn red now as Cuthbert's grip is actually choking her. She turns her back to the nearest corner and stumbles backwards forcefully, slamming Cuthbert's back into the corner buckles. She feels all three holds loosen as Cuthbert moans in pain. As she steps forward, Elisha slides down on to the middle corner buckle in a seated position. She turns to face Elisha, who tries to get up and out of the corner. She slaps a choke onto Cuthbert's neck hard enough that the crowd let out a collective “Ooh” and rams her back into the corner, trapping her. The ref gets her to release the choke, but after she does, she drives a knee into Cuthbert's gut. She repeats the move a few times, forcing the wind from her as she desperately tried to get it back. She then drags her winded enemy out of the corner, lifting her and slamming her to the mat in the center of the ring.

Cuthbert moans as she tries to roll away from Loken, but a handful of hair drags her back to her feet. Again, she's lifted in the air, this time she gets dropped across the knee of Loken in a wicked back-breaker. As Cuthbert lies helplessly and painfully across her knee, Loken starts raining two-hand slams into her belly. Cuthbert tries to raise her arms to protect herself, but as the punishment continues, her strength fails. She is, again, at the mercy of a blonde amazon. After a good ten to twelve blasts to the gut, Loken unceremoniously drops Cuthbert to the canvass. She takes hold of Elisha's blonde locks again, forcing her into a seated position on her knees facing away from her tormentor. Once she steadies her, Loken applies a dragon sleeper, trapping Elisha's head under her right arm and viciously arching her back. Without hesitation, Cuthbert issues a submission, realizing this is just the start of a long night. Mercifully, Loken releases the hold.

Cuthbert slumps her head forward, staying seated on her knees during the break. She hasn't the will to try and escape Kristanna at this point. At the restart, Loken again grabs a handful of beautiful blonde hair and drags her opponent to her feet. She turns her and lifts her by her torso into an over-the-shoulder back breaker. Again, Cuthbert is quick to submit. Loken drops her to the mat and again bides her time through the break.

“Please…,” Cuthbert pleads as the break continues. “Kristanna, please…you made your point. My back can't take this and we both know the match is yours. Anything but the back. Don't hurt my back anymore.” Elisha is on her side as she begs. Kristanna laughs at her as the ref signals the restart. She grabs Elisha up off the mat again by her hair and, this time, lifts her into a bear hug. As Elisha grunts her third submission, Kristanna rams her into the corner and her arms fly over the top ropes, apparently signaling a reluctance to lay off of the back torture.

Through the break, Kristanna stands right on top of Elisha, staring down at her with no hint of pity in her eyes. As the ref signals restart, Kristanna immediately steps up on the bottom rope and clamps Elisha's head in a claw hold. The leverage gained from her height and positioning on the ropes compounds the pain of the hold and Cuthbert screams in agony. She tries to get her hands up to relieve some of the pressure as she, again, submits, but they just won't move. Kristanna isn't releasing the hold, either, prompting the ref to start his count. When he reaches four, she relents, stepping off the ropes and taking joy in seeing tears fall from Cuthbert's eyes. At the restart, she pulls Cuthbert from the corner, bending her over and trapping her head between her legs. The crowd roars its approval at seeing their favorite move. Loken lifts her up by her torso, gripping her in an upside-down, reverse bear hug. The crowd goes crazy as Cuthbert's legs flop down resting her feet on Loken's shoulders as her crotch is right in front of Kristanna's face. As she dangles helplessly, Loken squeezes tighter, crushing the ribs and back in a vice-like grip. Cuthbert again surrenders, hoping for an end to her torment. As the ref starts his count, though, Loken falls forward, dropping to her knees and driving Cuthbert's head to the mat in a wicked pile-driver. She hadn't secured the head with her legs and it bent awkwardly to the side as it collided with the mat drawing a gasp from the crowd. They went silent as Loken allowed her to collapse lifelessly to the mat with a thud. Cuthbert didn't move at all as she lay on her back. Loken covered her up for the pin, but the ref told her she couldn't secure a pin during break. Loken told him that she wasn't going to be moving any time soon, so he could count whenever he was ready. Sure enough, after the restart, the ref counts Elisha out; 1, 2, 3. Kristanna gets up, waves graciously to the appreciative, but still stunned crowd and heads back to her dressing room, happy to have secured her first victory.